My depression back in January/February has changed the landscape of my heart, of my soul, of my personality. It broke me. It broke me deep inside. Because of that, my whole perspective on faith, on hope, on love, and on God, has changed to a much deeper level than I never knew existed. There are […]
Desolation never comes from God. — St. Ignatius of Loyola If it did, we would just be puppets. And where would our free will be then? St. Ignatius advised not to make any changes in the middle of a period of desolation. Well, I should follow that advice, but I am not. I’m scrapping large […]
Self-Pity has been whispering in my ear. He is sneaky, disguising his voice to be another, like a well-meaning friend, but false. He has been saying, “You’re tired Mark. You’re tired of falling. You’re tired of trying to get back up. You are just tired of it all. Feel the exhaustion in your bones, in […]
I was just telling my calculus students the other day, the first day of school, that a major difference between calculus and algebra is the way we view graphs of functions. In algebra, we tend to view a graph as a static picture. It just sits there. Oh look at that pretty graph of a […]
Just found out that my last surviving grandparent, my mom’s mom, died. Another link to my family history lost (for now). Mom passed away back in 1993 and there is hardly a day that goes by that I do not think of her. My wife left last night to take our oldest daughter to college […]
I know the following beautiful but frightening words written by Paula D’Arcy to be true in my head, but I am trying to learn them in my heart. I know that I have partially learned them, but my analytical side wants, but cannot give, a percentage. The percentage does not really matter anyway. I am […]
I have wanted to write and recommend this book for well over a month now, but the words never seemed to come to me when I sat down to write. This book has become one of those cornerstone books for me, one that has literary and figuratively changed my life. It has helped spell out […]
I have almost deleted this whole weblog three times in the past two weeks. Had my finger of the delete button, ready to go, but didn’t. Not sure why. I have not really been reading other weblogs either. Nothing seems to satisfy.
Someone gave my daughter a unique and modern looking St. Christopher medal as a graduation present. The image below is the same as the one on the medal. The text is from the little card that came with it. (by James Avery Craftsman.) St. Christopher once helped travelers ford a raging river. One, a small child, […]
I wrote the following paragraph in an email this morning to a very dear friend of mine. It was part advice, but it also pretty much summed up one of two of my current struggles in faith. I am learning that you have to give everything to Christ. Not only your joys and happiness, but […]
Just got back from co-directing a four day retreat for high school junior and senior girls. It was an awesome weekend, a great privilege and honor to serve others. I still need some time to process some of the powerful experiences I was graced to witness and be a part of. I hope to post […]
The soul must long for God in order to be set aflame by God’s love; but if the soul cannot yet feel this longing, then it must long for the longing. To long for the longing is also from God. — Meister Eckhart Maiken at A Case of Me isn’t “feeling all that Jesus-y lately”. She has […]
The experience of losing your faith, or of having lost it, is an experience that in the long run belongs to faith; or at least it can belong to faith if faith is still valuable to you, and it must be or you would not have written me about this. I don’t know how the […]
We are true worshipers and true priests. We pray in spirit, and so offer in spirit the sacrifice of prayer. Prayer is an offering that belongs to God and is acceptable to him: it is the offering he has asked for, the offering he planned as his own. We must dedicate this offering with our […]
This is a portion of a letter I wrote to one of my students recently: Yesterday, you mentioned something about being a little uncomfortable at Mass lately because you feel unworthy. I hope you never forget what I whispered to you after Mass yesterday: “Wherever the Blessed Sacrament is, you are welcome there.” You say […]
There seems to be two sides to faith, as if faith was a coin that has been handed to us. One side of the “coin of faith” looks externally, that is, it looks outside of ourselves to others who have modeled and lived faith for us. It is in accepting their testimony that helps us […]
The other night in the bookstore, the book The Spiritual Life by Evelyn Underhill immediately caught my attention. I thumbed through the beginning pages and the quote below made me freeze. I fear that I may be deaf. So many Christians are like deaf people at a concert. They study the programme carefully, believe every […]
Star by Janet McKenzie “Behold, the virgin shall be with child and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel,” which means “God is with us.” — Matthew 1:23, Isaiah 7:14 That maybe the most profound statement in the whole Bible—“God is with us”…something to keep in mind…and in our hearts…always…and then every day […]
Prayer and love are learned in the hour when prayer becomes impossible and your heart has turned to stone. — Thomas Merton In the last couple weeks or so, I have ran into a “problem” in my prayer life. I say “problem” because my first inclination is to try to fix it. But as I […]
God said to Joan, “It’s not about the answers; it’s about asking the right questions.” — From the TV show, Joan of Arcadia A dear friend of mine asked me a simple question the other day. Because of its simplicity, the question could have easily been discarded with a noncommittal kind of reply. No, I […]
A Hard Pill to Swallow — I read a book this summer that dealt with death, judgment, heaven and hell from the point of view of classic Christian theology. One specific point reminded me of something I have heard many times, but never thought too much of in my faith journey until this past summer. […]
Christy’s post reminds me of something I read about grace. There are two types of grace, sanctifying grace and actual grace…
I am a pilgrim stuck between two sides of darkness. I am happy, do not get me wrong, but I feel a little sense of restlessness. Behind me is one darkness, or at least I am on the outer edge of its shadow. (I hope.) I see, or rather sense down the road another darkness. […]
“Solitude is frightening for some and simply baffling for others.” “There is a big loneliness at the center of every person. It is universal. There’s a reason for the loneliness. It is meant to lead you somewhere. Even if you are unconscious of it, the big lonely is driving you homeward.” Fr. Daniel Homan and […]
While searching for some Benedictine weblogs, I found the following list of quotes highlighting Benedictine spirituality at One House. The original source is unknown, but the quotes come from the Rule of Benedict. The use of the word “rule” is meant as a “guide”, not a list of do’s and dont’s. Karen may describe the […]