Seeking Intimacy

We all are virgins of the heart. We seek, often desperately, intimacy with another person. But even in the midst of close intimacy, be it physical, emotional, spiritual, or intellectual, it is not perfect. Something is always missing. It remains unsatisfactory on some deep level, whether we are immediately aware of it or not. It is incomplete. The other is somehow still distant. And so we still feel incomplete, and the drive for intimacy continues to haunt us.
We long for perfect intimacy, but are denied. It is a good thing that perfect intimacy is impossible on this side of heaven. If two human hearts met in perfect intimacy, one of two things would happen. In one situation, one heart, because of our fallen nature, would try to control and use the other heart. In the other situation, one heart would be so overwhelmed by the infinity of the other heart, so frighten at the ultimate responsibility of perfect intimacy, that it would run away.
Only in the Trinity of God the Father, the Son and Holy Spirit does perfect intimacy exist, a total and complete giving and receiving—kenosis. Only can God not be tempted to control and use another’s heart. Only can God not run away from the ultimate responsibility of perfect intimacy. Only through God, with God, in God, will we finally be in perfect intimacy our hearts desire, at the great wedding banquet in heaven between the Groom and His Bride.
But this should not stop us from from reaching out to others here and now on earth. We still must open our hearts to others, for only heaven is closed to a closed heart. We attempt to prostitute our hearts only if we seek intimacy for selfish means, to control another, or to use another to alleviate the ache of our loneliness. To seek honestly and responsibly the many levels of intimacy in terms of friendship, compassion, hospitality, mercy, marriage, even prayer, is to seek out connections with others out of love.
The drive for physical, emotional, spiritual, or intellectual intimacy is a powerful energy whose source is the Body of Christ. And when we give this gift to others properly, it strengthens and reinforces the connectedness of the Body of Christ.
On one level, we all sleep alone. But not really. The one who loves is never alone.

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