In class yesterday, I had told the students to get out a half-sheet of paper and clear off their desks for a quiz. Some students were moving slow in clearing off their desk, desparately trying to re-memorize this small table of numbers they need to know for finding trigonometry values. I had just about every desk cleared when I noticed these two students up front, each lingering over the table longer than anyone else in the class. I teasingly asked, “Are you two cheating? Let’s put the notes away.”
Since the two students were honest, hard-working honor students who just happen to be dating, I posed a rhetorical question to several nearby students in an attempt to be funny. “If these two would cheat on a math quiz, would they cheat on each other?”
Unfortunately I said it loud enough for most of the class to hear it. Half the class went silent, the other half kind of chuckled a little. A girl from the back spoke up—the girl that is known to say stuff off the wall and out of the blue—“That’s a serious question,” and most of the class started laughing.
I hushed the class and agreed with the girl-from-the-back’s statement, adding that I would never expect those two to cheat on each other. The girl shot a quick glance at the guy. After a couple more comments, we began the quiz.
Today, I found out the guy had just cheated on the girl at a party this weekend. He was absent on Monday, so this was his first day back at school after the incident. Furthermore, the “other girl” sat in the back of the same class.
What timing! Do I know when to open my big mouth or what?
To be honest, I had no idea of any of this drama. This couple had been dating for nearly a year. Everybody knew them as a couple. She had been a positive influence on him and he knew it. I would have never expected him to ruin a good thing like that. But darn it if he did.
If I had known, I never would have said anything, especially out of respect for her. I rarely tease students about their relationships except maybe if they spend too much time on the telephone and not on their homework. I usually smile bigger to my students who are couples when I see them together being boyfriend/girlfriend at games or dances, but rarely in the classroom. My students who are couples are quite respectful in and out of the classroom.
The whole thing makes me wonder. What I said is something I would normally not say. But I said it and I said it now, at that this rough moment in their relationship. Why now? Was it a coincidence or just bad timing?
Lord, I hope I didn’t add fuel to an already difficult situation. Forgive me if I did. Please bless them. Help all involved to work through this, and learn from this incident. May they all be drawn into a closer relationship with You.