Courtesy and Discourtesy

Of Courtesy, it is much less
Than Courage of Heart or Holiness,
Yet in my walks it seems to me
That the Grace of God is in Courtesy

— Hilaire Belloc

John Saward, in his article, “The Grace of God in Courtesy” (via Flos Carmeli), writes about courtesy as part of all of the virtues:

Courtesy is not strictly distinct from the other virtues, but rather a quality to be found in them all. It has something to do with reverence, humility, and chastity. It is shaped by charity, the form of all the virtues, into the quality of mercy. It is the beauty of a brave and generous life.

And discourtesy then, must come from the Enemy:

If God’s grace is in courtesy, the devil’s disgrace lurks in
discourtesy. According to the author of “Piers Plowman”, discourtesy
will be one of the marks of Antichrist. William Langland prophesied a
terrible falling away from Christ and his Church, and the sign of
that apostasy would be discourtesy. Intellectual arrogance would lead
men into infidelity to Holy Mother Church, contempt for the little
and weak, and depravity of morals—in a word, into what Scripture
calls “the pride of life,” the deadly opposite of courtesy.

Near the end of the medieval poem “Piers Plowman”, Langland writes something that is eerily familiar about today’s culture:

Loud laughed Life…
And armed himself in haste in harlot’s words,
And held Holiness for a jest and Courtesy for a waster,
And Loyalty a churl and Liar a free man,
Conscience and Counsel he counted it a folly.

Pride, the devil’s favorite sin…

Stay or Go?

Christy at Dry Bones Dance (via Raw Faith) posted an interesting comment on the story about the woman accused of adultery by the Pharisees in John 8. This is where Jesus says the famous line, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”

I’ve been mulling it over, and I think I’ve figured out what the real difference is between the woman they caught and the Pharisees. It’s not attitude or self-righteousness or biblical knowledge or type of sin. The big difference is this: The Pharisees walked away. (Jesus didn’t ask anyone to leave. He just didn’t want them to throw stuff.) The woman stayed.

Ah! The beauty of Biblical stories. They always bring forth new levels of meaning and understanding. Christy further comments on this aspect of this story with:

Simone Weil once said that Christianity is a religion of waiting for God. We wait, and God shows up. When God does, our only job is to stay.

I do not think that was Weil’s original intent for his comment, but it does apply in this situation. All of this reminds me of something I read about grace. There are two types of grace, sanctifying grace and actual grace.

Sanctifying grace stays in the soul. It’s what makes the soul holy; it gives the soul supernatural life. More properly, it is supernatural life.

Actual grace, by contrast, is a supernatural push or encouragement. It’s transient. It doesn’t live in the soul, but acts on the soul from the outside, so to speak. It’s a supernatural kick in the pants. It gets the will and intellect moving so we can seek out and keep sanctifying grace.

God calls us, comes to us, in actual grace. Thomas Merton may have said it best with:

Every moment and every event of every man’s life on earth plants something in his soul. For just as the wind carries thousands of winged seeds, so each moment brings with it germs of spiritual vitality that come to rest imperceptibly in the minds and wills of men. Most of these unnumbered seeds perish and are lost, because men are not prepared to receive them: for such seeds as these cannot spring up anywhere except in the good soil of freedom, spontaneity and love.

Christy’s comments reminds us that we cannot find God on our own. He must call us. Grace is always calling us to choose to turn toward God. The question becomes whether or not you are listening for His call. Is the noise of the world, of your heart, of the Enemy, too much to hear it? And if you do hear the call, do you stay like the accused, broken woman in humility, or walk away like the Pharisees in their self-conceit and wounded pride?

As the saints always seem to ask, whose will are you going to follow, yours or God’s? I guess that ultimately determines whether you stay or walk away.

See more quotes on grace.

Hospitality – Part 5

More quotes from Radical Hospitality: Benedict’s Way to Love by Fr. Daniel Homan and Lonni Collins Pratt. See Part 4

We all have weapons to lie down and battles to call off before we can open up our hearts. It is a stance of surrender that we are talking about. Ultimately, hospitality is not about the table you set, or the driveway you plow. Hospitality is about preparing the holiest of holies. It is about the heart you make ready. Yours. (ch. 5)

(more…)

St. Benedict’s Prayer

Gracious and holy Father,
give us wisdom to perceive you,
intelligence to understand you,
diligence to seek you,
patience to wait for you,
eyes to behold you,
a heart to meditate on you,
and a life to proclaim you;
through the power of the
Spirit of Jesus Christ our Lord,
Amen.