CowPi
 Journal

I need to unpack the meaning of the words of one sentence from this post:

[G]race is the Holy Spirit Himself acting in our lives.

Grace is not an object, not something that is collected or possessed, not an add-on, not I-It. It is not analogous to a magic spell from God that suddenly helps you see the right thing to do. Grace is a relationship with a subject, a Person, with Reality, I-Thou (and I am the thou to God’s I Am). What I might label as grace is a recognizing of this relationship, an awareness of being open to God and to that moment of Reality.

The choice is always there, to accept or not. Holy Spirit, help me never to say “no” to You. (I have been told that this is a dangerous prayer.)

I was listening to the homily for today’s morning Mass on EWTN radio as I drove to work. The homilist, Fr. Joseph Mary, paraphrased Dietrich von Hildebrand:

The essence of purity is reverence.

Fr. Joseph Mary added, “…reverence for the person, reverence for my own dignity, and reverence for God. That is what the essential element of purity is.”

reverence = noun, a feeling or attitude of deep respect tinged with awe

To put it in the negative, impurity is irreverence (to the person, to my dignity, to God).

In other words, to be not pure means that I don’t care enough about the good of the other person. I am willing to use the other person for whatever I feel or want. This can be from the typical connotation of purity as lustful thoughts to outright sexual activity, but it also extends to how we treat other people in general—do I manipulate or exploit people, do I gossip about them, etc. It goes back to treating people as persons and not as objects. You use objects; you love persons. Purity is about the whole person, not just about their sexuality as most people refer to it.

Kierkegaard wrote, “Purity of heart is to will one thing.” It is to revere others, to will—to choose—the good for them. It is to be sensitive, mindful as the Buddhist would say, to the needs of others. It is to love them.

So what is missing in me—what hole am I trying to fill when I do not revere other people? I can be so selfish at times. Do I not trust God enough to know that He will indeed give what is needed, in other words, to feed me? Give us this day our daily bread.

Father, I believe. Help my unbelief. Help me to be more open, more mindful, more reverent.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

The song “Down to Earth” by Peter Gabriel is a catchy little song played over the closing credits at the end of the movie, WALL•E. The song fits perfectly with the ending of the movie and with its hopeful allusion to the future.

After further listening, I noticed that the song is dripping with great spirituality. Every line points nearly perfectly toward the virtue of humility, except for parts of the third stanza (after the second refrain), and even here, there are still subtle pointers. Remember the old saying about pride running away before the fall? Well, humility is the only thing that remains. The choice is to accept or reject it, be transformed by it and live fruitfully, or become angry, bitter and resentful. This song celebrates the choice to live humbly.

Did you think that your feet had been bound
By what gravity brings to the ground?
Did you feel you were tricked
By the future you picked?
Well, come on down

All those rules don’t apply
When you’re high in the sky
So, come on down
Come on down

[refrain]
We’re coming down to the ground
There’s no better place to go
We’ve got snow up on the mountains
We’ve got rivers down below
We’re coming down to the ground
We hear the birds sing in the trees
And the land will be looked after
We send the seeds out in the breeze

Did you think you’d escaped from routine
By changing the script and the scene?
Despite all you made of it
You’re always afraid
Of the change

You’ve got a lot on your chest
Well, you can come as my guest
So come on down
Come on down

[refrain]

Like the fish in the ocean
We felt at home in the sea
We learned to live off the good land
Learned to climb up a tree
Then we got up on two legs
But we wanted to fly
When we messed up our homeland
We set sail for the sky

[refrain]

We’re coming down (down)
Coming down to earth (down)
Like babies at birth (down)
Coming down to earth (down to earth)
Redefine your priorities (down)
These are extraordinary qualities (down)
(Down, down to earth)

[refrain x2]

Redefine your priorities
These are extraordinary qualities
To find on earth

(coming down, coming down, coming down, to find on earth)

From Br. Joseph —

This is the fourth reflection on seven signposts for the season of Lent (and for all seasons).

Signposts give us direction. They point to some place. They involve action, movement. Many signposts call us to remember something important, some thing that is already there but is often covered up by the minutia of daily life. Signposts represent a choice—to follow or not to follow. It takes grace to see a signpost and courage to follow where it points.

• • • Reflect love. • • •

Love, by its very nature, always reaches outward.

This is the center signpost. There is a signpost for hope and one for faith (trust). Love of course needs to be included. And being the greatest of the three, plus a direct reference to the very nature of God, it is especially highlighted.

All signposts ultimately point to where this signpost points. We are not the source of love. God is. We do not possess love. Love possesses us. We do not create love. We channel love. And love, unlike the limited nature of material things, grows as it is shared. God is prodigal. God is abundant and, I suppose we could even say, aches to share—to give away—Himself to us.

Love as described here is not an emotion. Emotions are important, but love is much more than emotions. Love, by its very nature, always reaches outward. In whatever shape, form or energy, love gives. Some synonyms for this giving love are service, sacrifice, compassion, selflessness, generosity and charity.

Scripture reveals that we are made in the image of God. This means two things, and both are equally correct. First, we are created as a copy—a person imprinted or made from an impression from a master image, the master image of who/what God is. This does not mean we are gods. We have some attributes like God, that is, beings with a will, an intellect and freedom to choose. We are called to be children of God, to be sisters and brothers of Jesus, to take upon the nature of our Father whose nature is to love, to give.

Second, we are an image as in a reflection—we reflect the image of God to others. We are mirrors, icons as the Eastern church might say, of God and of His love for us. How well do we reflect that love? God knows that each and every one of us is a broken mirror, but He still chooses to give to us, to shine upon us.

God wants to play catch. He throws us a ball called Love. Are we going to throw it back to God and to the next person? Or are we going to keep it?

Love, by its very nature, always reaches outward.

As flowing water falls to seek the lowest point,
It gives all its energy away until none remains,
And then returns to the source to fall again.
What does the water gain from this falling?
What does life gain?

Keep hope alive.
Dare to trust.
Surrender to grace.
••• Reflect love. •••

And don’t forget to polish your mirror a little. God will help…

Our Lady of Mercy is praying for us.

From Br. Joseph —

This is the third reflection on seven signposts for the season of Lent (and for all seasons).

Surrender to grace.

This signpost comes from a line in the book, The Lord by Romano Guardini. (A highly recommended book full of short, deep reflections on nearly every episode of Jesus’ life.) Although the sentence was referencing something specific, it applies to everything.

God’s grace rains down upon us every moment of our lives. A student once told me she likes to dance in the rain, and when she does, it feels like she is touching heaven, maybe even touching God, as the raindrops wash over her, re-baptizing her in His love.

God’s grace “reigns” down upon us every moment to open our eyes to see Him and His love for us, calling us into a deeper relationship with Him. We resist. We need to stop resisting. We need to surrender to this grace. Not surrender as in give up, but rather as in give over. Instead of swimming against the ocean currents of God’s grace, we need to learn to float in God’s ocean. Just as floating is not passive, surrender to grace is not passive. It requires action, teamwork, choice—much like a dance. Perhaps St. John said it best in his Gospel, surrendering to grace is abiding in God’s love.

Surrender to grace also means to stop resisting the present moment. Enough grace will be given to you to get through whatever you need to do. In other words, do what is right when you see that something or someone must be attended to—this is an opportunity given to you to love, and God will help you through it.

Keep hope alive.
Dare to trust.
Surrender to grace.

Our Lady of Mercy is praying for us…

If I just do my thing and you do yours,
We stand in danger of losing each other and ourselves
I am not in this world to live up to your expectations;
But I am in this world to confirm you
As a unique human being,
And to be confirmed by you.

We are fully ourselves only in relations to each other;
The “I” detached from a “Thou” disintegrates.
I do not find you by Chance;
I find you by an active life of reaching out.

Rather than passively letting things happen to me,
I can act intentionally to make them happen.

I must begin with myself, true;
But I must not end with myself;
The truth begins with two.

— Walter Tubbs

The third Matrix movie is just around the corner from being released in theaters. One of the many attractions of this trilogy is the symbolism represented in the movie, especially in the main character of Neo. Many have written about the process of enlightenment or awareness of Neo, but there is another famous movie figure that reached enlightenment too—Buzz Lightyear.^†

In the beginning of the movie Toy Story, Buzz is delusional in believing that he was a real space ranger on a mission to defeat the evil emperor Zurg. Woody, the leader of the toys in Andy’s room, tries without success to convince Buzz that he is just another toy like the rest of them.

There is the obvious symbolism between the new, high-tech, hard plastic, modern way represented by Buzz the space toy, and the soft, plush, old-fashioned way represented by Woody, an old-west sheriff/cowboy. (This theme gets more play in the sequel.) All of the old toys in Andy’s room like Buzz. He is new. He is novel. Andy even seems to play with Buzz more than Woody. In fact, Buzz displaces Woody from the place of honor in the room, the pillow on Andy’s bed. Woody is relegated to the toy box with the other toys.

Unlike Neo in the Matrix movies, Woody is no messiah or Buddha figure. Woody suffers from the sins of pride, jealousy, and selfishness. Eventually, Woody’s sins force him to initiate a sequence of events that would push Buzz down behind the dresser. Behind the dresser is a place of limbo for a toy because Andy and the other toys would not be able to find anything hidden down there. As fortune would have it, Buzz instead gets knocked out of the window. The other toys do not view this event as an accident and decide to banish Woody. Woody is saved at the last moment when Andy reluctantly takes Woody with him on a trip to a restaurant. Buzz hitches a ride on the bumper of the family van and confronts Woody at a gas station. It is during their struggle at the gas station that both of them are left behind.

The rest of the story is about their attempt to get back home. In the trials and tribulations of their adventure, Woody finds repentance for his sins, and Buzz finds enlightenment in discovering his true identity as a toy. Buzz comes to agree with Woody that it is nobler to bring joy and happiness in the play of a child than to be a conquering space hero.

It is worth noting that Buzz would not believe the truth told to him by Woody or the other toys. It was something that he had to discover on his own. (Like in The Matrix when Morpheus said to Neo, “I’m trying to free your mind, but I can only show you the door. You’re the one who has to walk through it.”) Only after accidentally seeing a Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger commercial on T.V., did he begin to have doubts. After the failed attempt at flying, Buzz’s self-identity and world view came literally crashing down around him. He became deeply depressed and despondent. Not even a pep talk by the ever-optimistic and pragmatic Woody helped. Buzz was only able to lift himself out of his depression and accept his new true self when he felt the need to help Woody out of his despair.

In the end, both Woody and Buzz learn that one finds happiness in service to others, and in discovering one’s true self.

^† Thanks to Brian, a senior religion teacher, for the original spark for this entry.

As a recent convert, I find great comfort in today’s reading of Matthew 20:1-16, The Workers in the Vineyard:

Jesus told his disciples this parable:
“The Kingdom of heaven is like a landowner
who went out at dawn to hire laborers for his vineyard.
After agreeing with them for the usual daily wage,
he sent them into his vineyard.
Going out about nine o’clock,
he saw others standing idle in the marketplace,
and he said to them, ‘You too go into my vineyard,
and I will give you what is just.’
So they went off.
And he went out again around noon,
and around three o’clock, and did likewise.
Going out about five o’clock,
he found others standing around, and said to them,
‘Why do you stand here idle all day?’
They answered, ‘Because no one has hired us.’
He said to them, ‘You too go into my vineyard.’
When it was evening the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman,
‘Summon the laborers and give them their pay,
beginning with the last and ending with the first.’
When those who had started about five o’clock came,
each received the usual daily wage.
So when the first came, they thought that they would receive more,
but each of them also got the usual wage.
And on receiving it they grumbled against the landowner, saying,
‘These last ones worked only one hour,
and you have made them equal to us,
who bore the day’s burden and the heat.’
He said to one of them in reply,
‘My friend, I am not cheating you.
Did you not agree with me for the usual daily wage?
Take what is yours and go.
What if I wish to give this last one the same as you?
Or am I not free to do as I wish with my own money?
Are you envious because I am generous?’
Thus, the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

This parable is about hope, and holds at least three lessons for me. First, it is never too late to find your faith in God. (Or Him find you.) While there is life, there is always hope. (This is one of the reasons why I do not believe we are living in the end times. I believe that as long as God can find one more soul, life on earth as we know it will continue.)

Second, this parable jabs at our human sense of fairness. It does not seem fair for a worker that only works for one hour to get a full day’s wage. God’s ways are not human ways. We should rejoice as God does when another lost sheep is found, no matter what hour of the day. Also, we should be grateful to have the opportunity to work for God in His vineyard, regardless of the length of time.

And third, we should not be comparing ourselves to other people. This is a slippery slope trying to keep up with the Jones’. Isn’t there a commandment about coveting your neighbor’s things? Our relationships with other people are very important, but the most important relationship is between one’s self and God.

Are you working in the vineyard today?

On the last day of class, one of my seniors disrespected me in a major way. I have seen her show disrespect toward other teachers and students over the last two years, but the frequency has increased during the last month or so. On occasion, she would do little things to me too. But this time, her offense was blatant and intentional. (See my quote about the character of seniors.)
Being the last day of school, there is not much point in any type of discipline. I guess she gets away with it. But I have lost all respect for this person. In fact, I was probably the last teacher that held any respect for her. But that is all gone now.
And the sad thing is, she does not realize any of this. She has trampled on all of her relationships without regard to people’s feelings. She has left a wake of burning bridges and doesn’t even smell the smoke.
As Christ as taught us, you must love your enemy. I don’t like this person any more. I have worked on trying to forgive her, but I am worried about what I will say or do when I see her at graduation. I pray that she finds some sense of inner peace. She is going to have a difficult life if she does not discover that God can be found in the way we interact and treat the people around us. And I honestly hope that she finds happiness in her life. It will be hard for her to find happiness unless she changes her ways.

Pauline came back from a retreat and described this wonderful metaphor: “You know when you’re watching a T.V. set that has really bad reception? The screen is really blurry and fuzzy. You can’t see the picture really well. That’s how my relationship was with God. I could hardly see the picture. I knew He was there, but I could never really see or feel Him in me. I doubted Him.” Now, after the retreat, she can see the T.V. picture better. “It’s not perfectly clear, but at least I can see the image.”
Is your reception blurry or clear?